I am always so afraid of hurting peoples feelings when in reality it's me who gets hurt. I give and give and give because that's just who I am and I end up being stomped on. Its a little bit ridiculous. I hate giving up on people. Which is why I have trouble thinking about my needs even if the situation I am in is not the best. Some times I just need to tell someone off or let someone know that they are being the biggest jerk on the planet. Sometimes I just need to go out in the middle of the street and scream at the top of my lungs. Sometimes I need to cry myself to sleep. But I always need to surround myself with people that lift me up instead of bring me down. I have been having trouble with trusting men. But I kinda realized something while hanging out with my FHE brother... not all guys want to hurt me. Some guys are actually legitley good guys. Some guys actually want whats best for me. So even though Im still terrified of marriage Im a little less terrified of men. Only because I know there are actually good guys out there. Sorry this is a ridiculous mess. I just couldn't write this all down on my facebook status cause it wouldn't fit. HAHAHA but seriously, I have a lot going on in my head right now and honestly the only way to get it all out these days is to write about it. so until next time I decide to explode all over my blog... love you guys!
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